As I thought more about this aspect of my relationship with God, I decided it was something I should explore more, so I asked Christine if we could explore it together in our discipleship times. We’ve decided to read The Sacred Romance, which delves further into the mystery of how God romances us as a lover romances his beloved. We’ve only read the first chapter, but God is already revealing truth about the kind of relationship He wants to have with me: “For above all else, the Christian life is a love affair of
the heart. It cannot be lived primarily
as a set of principles or ethics. It
cannot be managed with steps and programs.
It cannot be lived exclusively as a moral code leading to
righteousness…. The truth of the gospel is intended to free us to love God and
others with our whole heart. When we
ignore this heart aspect of our faith and try to live out our religion solely
as correct doctrine or ethics, our passion is crippled, or perverted, and the
divorce of our soul from the heart purposes of God toward us is deepened.” (The Sacred Romance p.
8)
I’m realizing how much I have made my “relationship” with God about what I’m “doing for Him” instead of actually spending time with Him. But that’s not what He wants. He wants an intimate and passionate relationship based on honest and open, two-way communication. And in order to facilitate that relationship, He is doing things to woo me, to draw my focus away from the things of this world to His glorious face.
I confess that I have often missed or never fully understood His attempts at wooing and romancing me (perhaps because I have never really been wooed or romanced in the human realm), but I have been asking Him to open my eyes and tune my heart to those things. I know that I am very often affected by nature, and now I think that many of those moments of experiencing the breathtaking beauty and majesty of a mountain or sunset or even a thunderstorm have been moments when God was romancing me. I think also of music, of melodies and lyrics that have moved me to tears, given me goosebumps, or filled me to the point of movement. He created me; He knows exactly how music affects me, and I think He has more often than not used music to say, “I love you. You are my beloved, and I love you.”
While we were in Wales this past weekend, He blessed me with the spectacular beauty of Lladudno- the mountains, the Irish sea, a gorgeous sunrise on Saturday morning. But there was one particular moment that particularly blessed me, probably because I almost missed it. As we walked along the city wall in Conway, we reached the remains of a tower at the highest point of the wall. This particular tower still had steps and a walkway, so railings had been installed so visitors could walk up and see the countryside from this tower. I started up the stairs, but because of my fear of heights, I stopped about 5 feet from the top and decided to take pictures of what I could see from there. Josh, our base leader, encouraged me to come the rest of the way up, saying the view would be worth it. I took a deep breath and braved my way to the top, took a few pictures, and then turned to look toward the mountains. What I saw took my breath away and almost brought me to tears. My camera didn’t do it justice, but this is how God chose to romance me that day.
I can’t wait to see what else He has in store for me!
